The Football Murder*

Fluffball helps me do a Tarot Reading this morning. Then I take him in to Mum for his breakfast and fall asleep again till half past eight, which is lovely.

Chat to Ben and Suzy and then go to Burston’s with Mum.

“Now, you’re not to let me get any more salvias,” Mum says. Then she spots one which is a different yellow from our yellow one, so I fail in my task:

New yellow salvia

Home, we walk around the garden 🪴. It’s another hot, sunny day. The red and yellow rose is flowering:

So is one of the new roses:

A red salvia:

One more oriental poppy:

Another peony:

Parentals go out for lunch. I stay here and have lunch and meditate 🧘‍♀️ but can’t sleep.

The England 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 versus Croatia 🇭🇷 football ⚽️ match is on and I’m watching it. We are a goal up with just eight minutes of play remaining. The players look so young, and indeed Jude Bellingham who has just come on is just seventeen. Haven’t watched football ⚽️ for ages and it’s fun. Meanwhile in the tennis, Stefanos Tsitsipas has taken the first set from Novak. Come on Stefanos!

Three years ago today, my friend sent me this elephant 🐘:

This photo of Fluffball came up on my Timehop too, which is one of my favourite pictures of my precious angel:

I’m going to have a bath 🛁 and an early night: busy day tomorrow with blood tests at nine o’clock and then Barre and then radiologist at ten to five.

Happy Sunday everyone!

*2020. By Roy Lewis. An Eric Ward mystery novel.

The Cry Of The Owl*

Yesterday: do Barre and then meet my teacher and another friend for lunch at Pizza Express in Radlett. It’s a beautiful day but we’re the only customers in the garden. People are strange.

Come home, meditate 🧘‍♀️ and sleep 😴. Wake up and watch the final set of Rafa vs Sinner, which Rafa takes 6 – 0.

Mum takes Fluffball to the vet who says he’s allowed Outside tomorrow 😱. We must just be brave and hope that nothing bad happens to our precious angel 😇.

Try to stay awake for Astrology Questions and Answers session but only manage ten minutes. Sleep from half past seven till nine o’clock when Mum gives me my pills. Sleep through till 5.41am this morning.

Today’s Tarot card. Look at that Great Grey Owl: isn’t he gorgeous 😍

Go with Mum for a walk round the garden 🪴.

Morning Glory
Red oriental poppy
Pink oriental poppy

This morning: wake up at 5.41am. Go in to see Mum and Fluffball. Feed him his breakfast and eat own breakfast.

Work Really Hard at Pilates today. It’s a tough class and I’m sweating 😓. Have to keep window 🪟 shut as there is someone on my bed:

Go to cancer hospital 🏥 for chemo. Christina – my favourite nurse – is going to be away next week so she shows Agata how to make my reclining chair into a bed. I’m a High Needs patient 😹.

Mum picks me up about half past two this afternoon and I have a small sleep before mango 🥭 coffee ice cream 🍨 and chocolate 🍫 brownie. Then we do my bath 🛀.?

Supper at quarter to six. Sit outside in the sunshine 🌞.

Let’s just hope that this chemo doesn’t make me ill. Thoughts 💭 and prayers 🙏 welcome.

Right it’s 6.41pm and I need to return to sleep 😴.

Happy Tuesday everyone!

*1962. By Patricia Highsmith. Brilliant thriller: read it!

Find You First*

Wake up crying about my ex-boss being dead. I have Bad Janet Days sometimes, just not as often as before. My darling ex-colleague whom I haven’t seen since the funeral comes round and we have flat whites and salted caramel chocolate 🍫 brownies from Costa with orange melon 🍈 and coffee ice cream 🍨.

It’s warm – twenty degrees – and sunny 🌞 and we sit in the garden 🪴 on a blanket.

Then she helps me with my bath 🛁 and puts a new dressing on my radiotherapy burn.

We talk about old times and I do a Tarot Reading for her face to face. I can hardly remember anything and then keep looking in the book 📖. I will stick to online readings until I have had more face-to-face practise. On the plus side the cards gave a resounding Yes! Go for it! to her question about whether or not to do something life-changing so that is good.

Meditate 🧘‍♀️ but can’t sleep. Get up and talk to brother briefly and then Suzy whilst she is on a long drive to deepest South London.

Mum comes to get me from flat and we change my sheets as it’s hot in the flat at night and I sweat all over them. I put the heating down at night but the temperature even with no hearing is about twenty degrees.

Do a wash and hang the clothes on the airer when I wake up from my sleep. Put dishwasher on and take out rubbish and recycling before I go.

Arrive home to find Fluffball in the front garden. Mum calls him but he doesn’t come in and vanishes.

Have my supper: toasted goat cheese and pesto sandwich 🥪 with raw spinach.

Mum goes out again to look for Fluffball and finds him in the hedge. She rattles his food bowl and he does running to get to his supper. Thank G-d. I was worried that he’d gone missing again.

Now am back in bed under my summer blanket which is dark purple velvet.

On the not-plus-side I have cystitis so will have to get something to treat it with tomorrow.

Happy Sunday everyone!

*2021. By Linwood Barclay. Murder mystery thriller.

The Drowning Kind*

Wake up at six o’clock but go back till half past eight. Pilates at nine fifteen for an hour and work hard. Astrology course half past ten till half past one. We learn about planets, houses and relationships. Will watch the rest later which is about work.

Sleep at two o’clock for an hour which isn’t long enough. Exhausted.

Ben comes round with my new birthday present Tarot deck: the Neon Moon. Thank you also to a couple of my cousins and another friend: it is not a cheap deck plus it shipped from America!

We sit in the garden in the warm sunshine 🌞 it’s lovely.

Ben changes my radiotherapy burn dressing. He has just finished working in a care home so is good at such things.

Now am back in bed at 5.55pm and will go to sleep in a minute.

Happy Saturday everyone!

2021. By Jennifer McMahon. Murder mystery thriller set in Vermont.

Sleeping Murder*

Wake up at six o’clock this morning after going to bed at eight o’clock last night. Have breakfast and go back to sleep till half past seven.

A couple of Mum’s friends come round and we sit in the garden 🪴: it is warm and sunny and Mum puts up the new red umbrella so I can have some shade. Go back to bed eleven till twelve o’clock.

We have lunch in the garden 🪴 for the second time this year. Dad brings me back to the flat and I sleep from two o’clock till 5.17pm when Suzy comes round. She sits in the garden and we have our supper. It is good to see her: it’s been a while.

I return to bed at ten past seven and do my Tarot Card of the Day. It’s apt that I pull the Four of Swords which is all about rest, taking it easy and taking a break.

It’s 8.14pm so I’m going to meditate and sleep now. I have a busy day tomorrow: all day Astrology course lectures and then Ben is coming round with my present 🎁 at 4.30pm.

I’m not quite sure whilst I’m suddenly So Exhausted. I’m on a lot of meds certainly. Oncologist says I must have as much sleep as I need. Also, today Pilates is cancelled and I don’t feel good if I can’t exercise.

I miss my fluffy angel nurse. I hope he is OK.

Happy Friday everyone!

*1976. By Agatha Christie. The last Miss Marple book. A classic. Read it!

Rules For Perfect Murders*

Fluffball nursing me on my bed 🛌 💜 🐱 🥰
And helping me with my Tarot card of the day 🎴
The first iris is open in the garden 🪴
My antibody test: I have antibodies!
Yesterday’s Tarot Card of the Day 🎴
Fluffball nursing me last night.

So last night I went to bed at 5.45pm, straight after supper. Fluffball was comfortable on my screwed up duvet and blanket so I picked him up and put him on the furry blanket on the far end of my bed. He looked after me until nine o’clock 🕘 at which time Mum took him away to have his supper which he usually has at 6.30pm but he’d been busy with me. He didn’t want his wet food. Then Mum tried to give him some dry food which he also rejected.

I slept from 5.45pm to five o’clock in the morning. When I wake up this morning I do my Tarot post from yesterday – am meant to post on my Instagram every day: #TarotEveryDamnDay. Then I write a chapter of the Memoir about Tarot and Astrology. Deadline is 31st May 😱. I do hope I can get a draft I’m pleased with by then.

Chat to Mary for our morning chat and then have my mid-morning snack: a scone with lemon 🍋 curd from the Farm Shop and cream cheese from Yummies.

Work hard at Pilates and then chat to my teacher and chums. It’s chemo at twelve so I pull on my silver velvet Onzie flares, my purple Rafa Nike jacket, my purple wig and my new purple Naomi Osaka Nike trainers. I look like I’ve been sectioned for thinking I’m Frida from ABBA.

At the cancer hospital I crawl into my bed Christina my favourite nurse 👩‍⚕️ makes for me. Then we flush the port with saline and then it’s Gemcitapine – half the usual dose to try to avoid me becoming ill this time 🤒 🤢 🤮 💩.

After chemo Dad picks me up and I settle down for my afternoon sleep. Sleep well and for about ninety minutes.

Have my post-sleep snack chocolate 🍫 brownie from Yummies in the village, some orange melon 🍈and some coffee ice cream 🍨 and an iced coffee ☕️.

Then fiddle about on phone for a bit: Facebook, Instagram and Amazon.

It’s supper at 5.17pm which is an asparagus and feta and Parmesan tart from Cook at the Farm Shop and English asparagus, tender stem broccoli 🥦, peas and cauliflower.

Return to bed where Fluffball is waiting for me. Pull a Tarot Card for the Day – see above photo. Talk to Suzy and Leon.

I’m just going to post this and then meditate 🧘‍♀️ and sleep.

Happy Tuesday everyone!

*2020. By Peter Swanson. FBI Agent Gwen Mulvey investigates and finds herself at the bookshop Old Devils. Murder mystery novel.

Salvador Dali Murder*

Spitfire looking out of my window this morning.
My new Naomi Osaka tennis shoes from Nike. I adore them.
My beloved Salvador Dali Tarot deck which I don’t use much but used yesterday.
Spitfire on my bed yesterday morning.

So, yesterday, I wake up at five o’clock in the morning after sleeping from 9.45pm. Woke up feeling tired. Wrote a list of Things To Eat When You’re Not Hungry for Memoir.

Worked hard at Personal Training and my biceps hurt now.

Tidy my room as I do everyday but it always becomes messy quickly. I have Too Much Stuff in here. On the plus side, Mum’s friend who works at the Oxfam bookshop takes away three boxes of books 📚.

Have made space for all my new Astrology and Tarot books.

Have lunch, meditate and sleep. Wake up and Mum helps me with my bath.

Have supper at five o’clock by which time I’m exhausted. Go back to bed after supper and fall asleep, ten minutes into my astrology course. That’s two weeks after three that I’ve missed now. The course is repeated on every other Saturday so I am going to try an all-day Saturday one next.

Happy Friday everyone!

*2015. By Howard DeWitt. Muslim terrorists are attacking Barcelona.

When Chimpanzees Dream Astrology*

Fluffball spat out his Piriton 4 times 🤦‍♀️ we try again tomorrow.
New normal colour wig for if I need to do Publicity for the Memoir when it comes out Soon!
Book by Amazing astrologer who spoke at the conference I attended on the astrological signs of different artists and architects and how this affected their work. Also he is very handsome and has sexy Berlin accent. Birthday 🥳 present from one of my favourite uncles.
Card for the day from my new Tarot Illuminati – birthday present from my bipolar male bestie Leon.
Card for the day for Mary. I love this deck 😻.
A second card for the day. I love the Prince of Wands in this deck. It’s one of my Heart 💜 Decks definitely 💚.
Look how stunning even the box is 📦!
This 😂

Go to sleep yesterday afternoon. Wake up at five o’clock for supper. Go back to sleep. Mum wakes me up and gives me my night time meds 💊 at nine. Sleep till six o’clock this morning.

Am upset as the Barre crew am at a Real Life Class that my darling teacher is now running at the new expensive sportswear shop in the village: Boutique 8. I’m not allowed to go because COVID-19 🦠. Cry 😭. Return to bed.

Speak to Mary. Feel a bit better. Go to Destiny Rising at the farm and buy some Energy Incense. In the farm shop purchase:

  1. Lemon 🍋 curd
  2. Cook 👩‍🍳 Asparagus, pea, feta and Parmesan tart which have for supper and it’s excellent 😋.
  3. Chocolate 🍫 ice cream 🍨 with chunky bits.
  4. Cook 👨‍🍳 Mexican Three Bean Chilli.
  5. Freshly squeezed orange 🍊 juice 🧃 and freshly squeezed cloudy apple 🍏 juice by Folkingtons.
  6. Iced coffee ☕️ in cans.

Speak to my psychiatrist Dr Stein and he waves his magic wand 🪄 and everything seems better.

Talk to Leon and Mary again. Am cheerful today.

Sit outside in the garden in the sunshine 🌞 with Mum and Fluffball. Wear sun hat 👒 and dress 👗 and Fit Flops 🩴. Walk to post box 📬 with Mum. The house martins are back from Africa for the summer. They return to the same house 🏡 in Beech Avenue every year. It’s a miracle.

Call GP surgery to make an appointment to talk to doctor 👩‍⚕️ next month: she wants to speak to me every month. Talk to Rosie – well-being coordinator at my synagogue 🕍 who used to be at Mind and she’s coming round on Friday morning. Need the extra support as really ill ATM 🤢 🤮 😫🥶😰🥱😴😪🤧🤒🤕😷.

Tidy bedroom a bit but it’s a losing battle.

Cuddle Fluffball. Try to assemble my new Lego knights but they’re fiddly and I’m too tired.

Talk to parents whilst they have supper.

Now finally am writing this. Going to sleep a bit later tonight as am determined to have a lie-in tomorrow: fifteen hours of sleep last night was good: I need More Sleep Every Night.

Just have to write my Tarot Card of the Day post now.

Happy Wednesday everyone!

*2004. By Alexander Graf Von Schlieffen. An introduction to the quadrants of the horoscope.

Evil Under The Sun*

Wake up at five o’clock this morning after sleeping from nine thirty last night. Write ✍️ eight pages of Memoir.

Have breakfast with Mum and Fluffball: a scone with cream cheese. Then write ✍️ six more Memoir pages.

Leave an urgent message with the cancer hospital 🏥 for oncologist to call me.

Work really hard at Barre: lots of inner thighs, obliques and glutes – plus triceps, Dumb Waiter and push ups.

After the chat with my exercise chums, see that oncologist has called but phone didn’t take his call as was on Zoom. Leave a message with the nurses asking him to call back. Feel stressed and frustrated 😥.

Go to the Farm with Mum to buy vegetables, Seville Orange 🍊 marmalade, lemon curd 🍋, mint choc chip ice cream 🍨, fruit juices and scones. No scones are available till Thursday, sadly.

Bump into a parental friend there who is reading my book 📖 In Bloom and thinks it’s brilliant. This is Such a Wonderful feeling: I will never become bored of praise for my writing.

Oncologist calls at lunchtime. We agree to restart chemo on an even lower dose on 25th May, after my two weeks of birthday festivities 🥳 🎉 🎂. Am relieved that am not being left to die just yet. All I need is some attention from my doctors 🥼 and I am happy.

Manage a scrambled egg 🥚 with mushrooms 🍄, salad 🥗 and tiny bit of mint choc chip ice cream 🍨. It tastes good but sadly it isn’t green.

Macmillan nurse 👩‍⚕️ visits after lunch. We sit in the garden 🪴 in the sunshine 🌞. She agrees to liaise with the cancer hospital 🏥 and to teach Mum how to give me anti-sickness injections at home. Also, I may be able to go into the hospice if I’m ill after next chemo so that’s good. We are really lucky to have found such a practical, sensible and kind Macmillan person: have had some less good ones in the past.

Meditate 🧘‍♀️ and sleep 😴. Then sit out in the garden 🪴 in the sunshine until six o’clock: it’s only sixteen degrees but feels much hotter in the sun.

Catch Fluffball and cuddle him and take him inside for his supper. Next am going to do my Tarot Card For The Day.

Happy Tuesday everyone!

*1941. By Agatha Christie. Classic crime fiction Hercule Poirot novel. Read it!

Tarot: No Questions Asked*

Wake up after a good night’s sleep and reread a hundred pages of “The Best Awful”. It’s brilliant and hilarious. Fluffball sits on the windowsill, desperate to go out.

My amazing quartz point, yellow quartz and hematite arrives all the way from Florida. Thank you so much Snakes in the Grass and Gorgeous.

After Pilates, go for a drive with Mum to the Farm. We see the peacock 🦚. Then I pop into the Destiny Rising shop to let them know that I’m still alive.

Have aubergine 🍆 and goat 🐐 cheese bake with baked potato 🥔, broccoli 🥦 and cauliflower.

Meditate 🧘‍♀️ and sleep. Wake up and have coffee ☕️ and then my supper at quarter to five.

When I wake up I do a paid Tarot Reading for a new client:

Mum helps me with my bath 🛁 and puts some Aloe Vera gel on my back for the third time this day. Back is So Sore: prickling under my skin.

Now I’m watching Rumpole with the parentals and Fluffball.

Happy Tuesday everyone!

*2020. By Theresa Reed. Mastering the art of Intuitive Reading.